I keep walking away from my laptop. I keep going back-and-forth with this entry. Write it? Don’t? What do I say? I’ve decided that the best for me is to just sit here and type away and just let it all flow through my fingertips.
This will be my second half marathon. I’ve run a few 5k’s, a half relay with my best friend, Evette, a 5 miler, a 10k and a half. For my first 5k, I was a little bit nervous but it was more excited nerves. By the time I got to my first half marathon, I had the 5k’s and the 10k under my running belt and I felt like I had learned from them and had trained hard for the half and I was ready. I was excited the night before and the morning of but when people asked if I was nervous, I didn’t really feel that I was. I was prepared, I had a time in mind, but I was there to run the race and just do the best I could. The excitement increased to a bit of nerves at the starting line but I was ready to go!
Fast forward to now and the half I will be running in 2 days. I was super excited for this race! We’ve driven into Philly a couple times and when I became a runner and we drove past the Schuylkill River, I said to my husband, “that would be so pretty to run around!” Then, the opportunity presented itself when I saw the Rock ‘n’ Roll Philadelphia Half. I asked my best friend, Evette, to run it with me and it will be her first half. Training was going great and I was getting stronger and faster and I was confident that I could run it faster than my first half! Then, I injured my toe and my foot has been all messed up.
I am back to running but I haven’t gone far and I’m certainly not as fast as I was. Do I think this will be a good race? No. I have decided that I need to just go into it knowing that it won’t be my best though and just enjoy the experience and be there for my bestie and the 40+ women from the running club I belong to that are running it…that’s right…over 40 of us! If I have to walk most of it then so be it. It will be fun just being there with everyone!
The nerves really crept up on me this morning though! I decided to run 3 miles this morning. The plan called for me to rest but I haven’t run much in my new shoes and I felt like I needed to get in another short run to see how everything was going. I woke up this morning and I was a bundle of nerves! I went to eat a piece of toast with some Pocket Fuel Coconut Cherry Almond Butter. After a couple bites, I looked at my husband and said, “I think I’m gonna be sick!” He asked why and I told him I’m that I’m so nervous and he said, “you’ll do great!” I wish I had his confidence in me.
Tomorrow will be fun shopping at the Expo and having dinner with Evette. I don’t know what Sunday morning will bring. I hope that I will be excited and I can keep all of the bad thoughts away and enjoy myself. I’m actually sitting here wondering if I should even wear my Garmin. My pace getting slower has become a big mental thing for me and I’m constantly looking at it. Should I just go on feeling for this one?